The Tao of Agressive Senility

You know how they say that its only the good that die young? And that evil people live prolonged lives for some reason? Well I got living breathing proof of that today at the hospital. Some old man seemed to be giving the nurses a really hard time. He threatened many times to rip the Iv out of his hand himself if they didn't let him out soon, and also kept saying that the nurses didn't know what they were doing. He talked about how he's had an uncommon resilience to heart attacks. He also explained that one of the lawsuits he has going is against a doctor. Just before getting dressed he scolded nurses about taking too long and then kept screaming "don't come in, or else you'll see my privates" as he was changing.

As per usual I was asked to escort the old man to the front entrance where his ride was waiting for him. I did my best to make sure that this encounter didn't go sour , by pointing out that we both have goatees and that "great mind must think alike". But, halfway there he realized he had a question to ask, I said I'd run back and ask the nurses for him. Upon finding him outside the hospital I told him the answer to his question, an answer that he was not pleased to hear. He then proceeded on a curse filled tirade, culminating with "f*#% em', I'll do whatever I want."

Now rather than wishing him on his merry way I did what I often do and uttered something needless and stupid. I said "My, you sure are filled with pip and vigor", after realizing what I had just said he gave me an angry look accompanied by saying "what?!". Realizing the volatility of the situation I said the one thing that I knew would flatter him more than anything. I called him "a 'Canadian' Clint Eastwood", to which he responded positively with a rant about "hell yeah, I never took no crap from none and....Never lost a fight...". At this point he decided to fill me in on his other-side-of-the-track upbringing.

Evidently he was very happy to have the opportunity to tell me all of this as he made his ride a lap of the hospital parking lot waiting for him to finish his speech. Its kinda interesting, despite how different we were, by carefully planning what I said, we kinda connected in a strange profanity-laden way.